Word to the wise: don't ever -- EVER -- install 50+ T-posts with no gloves on. Lesson learned.
Side note: I didn't realize how often my hands are washed on a daily basis as the mommy of two toddlers. Ouch.
The reason I was installing 50+ T-posts on Labor Day while my husband was at work? (And I actually did have the help of my father-in-law.) We are checking off an item on the bucket list: fence in a pasture so we can acquire animals and kick off this hobby farm. Woo! We already have two donkeys we've spoken for from a cousin who is suddenly running an unwanted donkey-breeding facility (if you catch my drift); and we're hoping to soon check off another big item on my bucket list: bring Joey home. Gah, I'm so excited to have my first baby with me again!
Other animals to make the cut in future will hopefully include: some Rhode Island Reds, a few Dwarf goats, another horse for Jacob and the kids because once Joey and I are reunited I will not be sharing, maybe a pony, I want to try my hand at honeybees some day, and I also dream of raising SOME KIND of animal for fiber. Though my vote is for Angora goats. Maa!
Speaking of kids: we hit a rough patch a couple weeks ago, the kids and I. We were all in terrible moods it seemed around the clock; life was monotonous and we were really bored (even though I have plenty of housework to do all the time, I told you previously about my quest to spend quality time with my kids and balance the chores) -- but what do you do with two kids under 2?? You can only do the same three puzzles and read the same five books so many times in a day. And we just don't have the budget (or the desire) to buy new toys every time we get tired of the old ones.
I also realized that Jacob and I were becoming frustrated with each other come the weekend. He would get home from a long 50-hour work week and all he wanted to do was relax on the couch and breathe. Meanwhile, all I wanted to do was drop the kids off anywhere with anyone and go out and do something because I was sick and tired of being at home. If we did it my way, he would feel exhausted all weekend, heading into a new work week come Monday morning; and his way made me feel trapped, unappreciated, and stressed to the max. Imagine never leaving your job. Ever. Clearly, we were missing something.
Then I was folding laundry one day a couple of weeks ago. Sometimes I listen to a book on Audible while I do house chores or puzzles during nap time. This one was called "Girl Wash Your Face" by Rachel Hollis. It's basically a motivational book by someone who is unabashed to talk about the hard and personal things. One thing she said that really struck me during the chapter on being a good mom was that she recommended getting out of the house -- every day.
Ok, I thought, I don't know about every day, but maybe she's onto something.
I remembered back when I was a geeky homeschool kid, my mom took us out it seemed like every single afternoon. At the time -- no, still -- I wonder why on earth she would do that to herself: load up seven children in a church bus for a couple of hours every day. Because now that I'm a mom, I understand the effort that went into that. Can we just get a round of applause for my mother for a sec? Good gracious.
But now I also understand that if she had not taken us to the library every Monday, and then to the park on Thursdays, etc, she would have probably murdered all of us before we were past the age of 10.
I kid. Maybe only slightly.
I thought, Even planning on going out twice a week with two babies sounds like a suicide mission. And what am I even supposed to do with them?? Where on earth am I supposed to take two small children who currently scream like banshees for absolutely every emotion??
Why, to the park of course. During school hours. When nobody is there to care that they are talking like Pterodactyls to each other and I am answering back in the exact same pitch about the Canadian geese we just saw flying overhead.
So the first week of this experiment, we literally just went to the park. Every day. Because, really, what's my excuse when the park and the lake are like a half mile from my door?
It helped that that particular week was overcast and had cold fronts moving down every single afternoon -- nice and breezy in the mornings before lunch and naps, slightly stormy and rainy during nap time. I was literally high-fiving myself every single afternoon, and not at all afraid to continue the trend.
But the next week was supposed to be warm and blindingly sunny and unbearably humid again. So what then? I called up my mom and finally anchored down that once-a-week play date that she's been pestering me for; and they have a pool, so it's very much a win-win-win-win-win. and bestie-time in the bag!
Then I realized that Katie Jo absolutely loves books. (Ok, we've known this since she was about 9 months old.) What place has air-conditioning, is two miles from my house, and has books we can borrow and return for new ones every week? Bingo. The library! No money spent (except to get my address up to date on my license so we can acquire a library card; but that's a story for another time).
We also nailed down a for-sure park visit to the beautiful city park each week in the cool hours of the morning after breakfast before we pick up our grocery order -- which we were going for anyway.
All of that to say, y'all, that you can not sit around waiting for life to happen to you -- you have to happen to it. Are you unhappy? Change something.
All of the attitudes in my household did a complete 180 after I started getting creative and fun with our outings. Jacob and I aren't frustrated with each other on the weekends anymore because I've already gotten out of the house and gotten some me-time without waiting on him for it to happen.
Of course, I'll have to keep tweaking our schedule as life happens and the seasons change; but, honestly, I thrive on that kind of creative challenge. I feel proud, like I'm Super Mom or something for getting two kids under two out of the house nearly every day -- and we don't hate each other over it. I also know it's keeping me active and off my butt, and that makes me feel good about myself. A change of scenery other than the piles of laundry and dishes and toys is super nice for my mommy-anxiety, too.
So my advice to unhappy mamas? Try to zero in on why you're unhappy and do something about it. For me, it was monotony. So I create outings for me and my babies. Ironically enough, it's helping me stress way less about getting the house chores completed.
And also my advice to anybody looking to install a new fence: wear gloves. Please.
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